Maybe it's because I'm a Londoner...

...that I love Nodnol Town? Maybe it's because there's pretty much a new street to go down every day, or a new shop or church or sight or concert to see?

Stood for about 10 mins this morning looking in the window of an estate agent in Victoria (Hathaway's?) checking out their portofolio of period properties on offer. Some of the houses in this fair city biggle the mond. Trouble is that if you elect to live in the 'conservation area of St James', with access to the park and the convenience of Victoria Station' it's a pretty long walk to find a paper shop or a 7-11 grocers past office hours. Great for pubs though, as every Westminster schoolboy and schoolgirl will know.

But nowadays I am genuinely happy living in Lavender Hill, where the instrument shops nestle next to the model, toy, puppet and fish n chip places. Here we have no infestations of phone shops a la King's Road, nor their profusion of any-posh-town retail outlets: not for us a sea of sandals stretching to the false Oasis points of the Starbucks...

Here, where one knows the locals, and the un-Commonness of Clapham is kept at bay by the estates to the Northside of the Hill, where Pat at the launderette has been in small employ since about 1970 and busy with the Harper account since 1998, it is a far cry from the City boys of SW3 and SW1. Here, in this rural idyll, not a hundred thousand furlongs from Sloane Square, we know the meaning of saying hello to our neighbours (in court) and being welcomed to help ourselves to those same neighbours goods without question (from the flytip sites outside the flats). Here all is peace and plenty: (there's plenty of things in pieces littering the streets): here where the family is celebrated and mourned (he's not getting married again? Oh goody! One less gangster to avoid outside the Londis.)

Sardonism aside (is term correct?), I love Lavender Cross - my name for the junction of Lavender Hill/Queenstown Road/ Cedars Road and Wandsworth Road - you know it, dear SW London commuter? That cosy traffic lights where Caffe Nero views a little Sainsbury's and a bookies at the far reaches of SW11, before the sweep up to the Elysian heights of Clapham Common.

I've taken of early to pounding the pavements of L.C. at 530am dressed in appropriate joggeth garb in my version of hitting 40. Anyone out there having the same phenomena? On the plus side, I'm sleeping well; on the neg: I'm spending more on food! Eating healthily though and really relishing it (as opposed to eating wealthily and with lots of relish).

Nodnol at that sweet and tender hour is another country - they do things differently there. Better class of driver and limousine parked outside Ashtar, our local nightspot... the pigeons are more chilflapxed for starters... the pavements cleaner and emptier. The buses run more fleets per foot, the shops are more shut, the planes have their earmuffs on and the skies are hopeful and, at this time of year, Vernal... the vermin are hungry in the binrooms mind.

This Sunday 27th May, at Tarragon Persian Restaurant, hosted by me courtesy of Kami and Simin the owners, there's to be the 5th Literary Lunch. (43 Lavender Hill, London SW11 5QW). A host of youtube TV stars will entertain and amuse, delight and provoke to deliberation the assembled crowd with words, music and song and we shall feast (sort your own bill though guys) on whatever sweetmeats the kitchen and wallet affords. Only in Lavender Hill, where the buildings are pastel and the cubicles at Starsteam sauna over the road are a bit sweaty... OR SO I'M RELIABLY INFORMED!

From 1pm. Feel free to turn up and be nice.

GRAZIE!